Honest...part 2

actually....to be honest that...

im hunger for love but im not capable for love.

in my very previous blog i already had one of this.

i make some mistake and it make me lost one of my friends....

i just try to be honest that i love....

but....after all it come to and end.

and it make me feel down and sad for the whole month....

i really don means to but i just cant control myself to being like this.

ok....just maybe for other people that not my type.

i know their are very hard to understand the feeling that love by someone that is not normal.

and their are scare about that feeling also.

as one of my friend said....i don might you are....but....just don fall in love thats fine.

i understand what his means....

i understand.....but don know why i just cant control myself.

An honest will drag everything come to an end.

You don't means that but it is means to him.

something i think....

i really need a psychology doctor to get rid of my sickness.

a disease that cant be cure and cant be heal.

a critical childhood life,change my whole entire status and my way to a proper relationship.

sometime when i think back is really stupid..

but what can i do....is already over and over...

it cannot turn back the time and i don change anything now.

some of my friends that know im different their give me advice and opinion.

tell me to give a chance to move back to the way that belong to you...

but what i can said is....im very appreciate that they all told me that.

but my mind don let me change for it....

inside my brain...there's a part name...honest.

im already no longer can have a girlfriends.

and...if i really do...i will tell them that i am a person that cant be share.

i just don want to be that dishonest to them....

but it change everything....

there's no way to change who i am now....

im quite happy with that.but in the other way....i feel sad about that..

but somehow i wont do suicide this kind of stupid thing.

i bet you know the feeling that being lonely...

sometime the feeling it just like...

the whole entire world has abandon you.

and you want to find a person that you really can have a deep hug.

an ear that can absorb every painful memory that you have.

a shoulder that you really can lay on and cry on it...

but the one that im looking for....is just a part of my dream.

i been dreaming this since i come here.

i been trying to push myself that will fall in love with a girl...

somehow i wont success..

what can i say?

Poem???

The Lunar Light will purify the pain of love...
A drop from Yggdrasil will cure the wound of love...
A tear from Phoenix will revive a dying love....
A kiss...will recover the fragile heart of love.....

消失的文字2

我爱你，你却不懂。但每次我注视着你，那种感觉却在脑海里徘徊。我不会跟你表白也没有勇气跟你说明，因为我知道你可能是属于他的。你不懂，无所谓，让我一个人旁边默默地喜欢你，注视着你就好了。因为。。。这样才不会失去一朋友。我。。。喜欢你。

看到你了，但手却抓不着你。想到你了，但你却在我梦里出现。了望你的时候，多么希望你会看过来，对我一笑。。。哪怕只是那短短的一秒，都经已让我满足。。。

明知道没有可能得到你的心的我，却每天都在想着你。明知道没有可能牵到你的手的我，却每天跟在你左右。有人会说我死缠难打，别人不了解无所谓，因为我只想让你知道，其实有个人每天都在。。。关心你这就够了。。。

消失的文字2

have to said sry to felix first.

coz i din blog in english...coz....

it is really hard to translate to english....although can....is very simple english

我爱你，你却不懂。但每次我注视着你，那种感觉却在脑海里徘徊。我不会跟你表白也没有勇气跟你说明，因为我知道你可能是属于他的。你不懂，无所谓，让我一个人旁边默默地喜欢你，注视着你就好了。因为。。。这样才不会失去一朋友。我。。。喜欢你。

看到你了，但手却抓不着你。想到你了，但你却在我梦里出现。了望你的时候，多么希望你会看过来，对我一笑。。。哪怕只是那短短的一秒，都经已让我满足。。。

明知道没有可能得到你的心的我，却每天都在想着你。明知道没有可能牵到你的手的我，却每天跟在你左右。有人会说我死缠难打，别人不了解无所谓，因为我只想让你知道，其实有个人每天都在。。。关心你这就够了。。。

消失的文字。

当跟喜欢的人在一起的时候，就算不出声，不说话，都会很开心。

寂寞的眼神，逃不了喜欢的人的眼睛。

但，双方对忘时。。。却是很幸福的。

对望的时间所剩无几，所拥有的东西要慢慢的离开自己的视线。

寂寞的孤单并非一言一语所能表达。

只能远远的了望一却无法抓住的幸福离开，散去。。。

男人的负担不是所有女人可承担。

女人的情感不是所有男人可忍受。

离去的身影无法带走回忆与过去，消失的爱情无法抹去悲伤与曾经拥有。
那道伤痕只能用眼泪遮盖。。。却无法用爱情来修复。。。

Lonely

Im so lonely....

thats all.

what can i said about this.

i think theres no love in my life.

and im not suitable for love also.

somethings wrong.

Lonely is more pain than Sad.

Hang out

Do you still remember when is the last time you hang out with your primary or secondary school mates?

But most probably we will must hang out with secondary school mates.Why?

I don't know and i really don't get it.

Maybe it just a two different category of age?Or maybe we just haven't grow up yet?

And did you realize that,the contact number in your handphone or maybe phone book mostly didn't contain any of your primary school mates number.Although it have,but just a few one.

For my own,the person that i still contact with is just two to three,what i means is primary.For secondary i have a lot but all is different group.

But when i really want to hang out with someone or maybe supper with someone at night,there's only one group that i will go with or invite to go.

I remember last time when i ask my sis that why she got a lot of friends in her facebook and why every time she also can hang out with a lot of friends.

And i'm quite jealous about that.Weird right?

But what she said is the best part.She said:"No matter how many friends you have,there's only one group that you can always hang out with them.Although you have a lot of friends,but it doesn't means that everyone will hang out with you.You must know that."

After she said that,my mind suddenly get clear.

And it is true that,although you really have a hundred or thousand of friends,but there's only one or two group that you can really hang out with.

So....

"Friends you can get easily,but true friends is not that easier."

"While the time you jealous about your friends.Actually your true friends already stand beside you...It just that you didn't realize that only."

What are you waiting for?

Go hang out with your friends now~